Profile: Ron Jeremy

Despite the favourable topic of conversation, by now Jeremy is dropping in and out of sleep – a curious predicament that even the most dexterous of journalists would find challenging. To keep going in the hope the interviewee may be roused, or to terminate the interview immediately? I attempt the former, asking him about his knowledge of the late champion horse named Ron Jeremy, then firing him a risqué question about private (or should it be privates?) insurance. Before long his words are falling away and he is fast asleep.

Product lowdown

Hietalahti steps in to give me a rundown on the rum. The seven-year-old is aged in bourbon barrels and made by Francisco ‘Don Pancho’ Fernandez at Alcoholes y Rones de Panama. Don Pancho is a 73-year-old Cuban-born master blender who over his career has had a hand in rums such as Havana Club, Abuelo, Zafra 21, and Panamonte XXV Preciosa. What’s more, the distillery owns its own sugarcane fields, so it has control over the quality of its molasses. 

The brand currently sells around 70,000 bottles a year in some 15 markets, and Hietalahti’s company, One Eyed Spirits, is looking for backers to expand the brand’s distribution further. In fact, through crowd investing, anyone willing to invest 1,000 can buy a share in the brand line. The licensing deal with Jeremy covers all spirits, so Hietalahti has plans for other Ron Jeremy-themed line extensions. Surely a brandy named Jeremy de Jerez is a frontrunner. 

As I make preparations to leave I thank Hietalahti and turn to Jeremy who by now has his head hung back and is gently snoring. Maybe a share in Ron de Jeremy isn’t such a bad idea, I ponder, looking down at the 59-year-old porn star – quite literally Hietalahti’s sleeping partner.